I photographed M.’s big brother as a newborn. I can’t believe how quickly time has passed. He suddenly looks so big next to his little brother! Those first few weeks of having a newborn in your home are so incredible. It’s as if time stands still within your walls even though the world keeps moving forward in the world outside your home. Days are spent gazing at eyelashes and earlobes, counting little fingers and toes, feeling the small weight of a tiny body against your chest. Damiano and Stacey, once again, I feel so blessed that you have asked me to be a part of these first moments for both of your sons. They are so beautiful!

Luke and Dana, congratulations! Your little family is so beautiful. I’m looking forward to seeing you again in a few months. I’m sure W. is going to be full of chubby baby rolls and smiles. I can’t wait to see him interacting with his big sister.

I should never have worried. Minutes after you were born, as I held you to my heart and nursed you for the first time, I realized that I didn’t have to divide my heart into two.

There was enough room. There was enough love.

Amelia Rose. You arrived without the lusty cry that had erupted from your sister’s tiny lungs on her birth day. Wide eyed and peaceful, you were content to just be a part of our little family. To just be. There was a snowstorm as you were born, and the roads to our little town were closed. When it was clear that you and I would be just fine, and that Daddy and Lilah would take good care of us, the midwives who attended your gentle birth braved the roads.

We became a family without any visitors or distractions as the snow continued to fall. In the moments, hours, days that followed, we curled up in front of the fireplace and took you in. Your little fingers and toes, your serious brow, your bald little head, the little pink birth mark between your eyes, the soft moon of your cheek as you nursed.

You were perfect in every way.

The morning after your birth you laughed. It was clear as day. “Ha ha ha” in your tiny little voice. We almost didn’t believe it. One day old, and you had already given us a glimpse of your personality which would emerge in the months to follow. Amelia Rose, Millie, you are such a happy child. Your smile makes me smile. Your hearty laugh is contagious. You remind me daily to find joy in our ordinary life and to wonder at ordinary things.

As I write this, you are napping beside me. Lilah is reading me a book (it’s a story about Autumn, but she has titled it, “Lilah’s Rule Book” and is listing off her rules). I look down at you as you begin to stir. You open your eyes and your face lights up with that gapped-tooth smile. Your cheeks are still rosy from sleep. You squirm until I set you down on the floor so you can chase your big sister down the hallway of this old house. You giggle and look back at me, wobbly on your one year old legs that have just learned how to walk.

The walls creak. Hundred year old brick and mortar. They will soak up this fleeting moment along with me.

Weeks ago, Lilah turned three. Today you are one. No one needs to tell me how quickly these years will pass. I have not yet seen a child of mine grow up, but as you look back at me, I am beginning to see what it will look like.

Amelia Rose, my little Millie, you will always be my joy. Mama loves you.

My aunt Gail dangled my wedding ring over my belly with a thread. As the old wives tale goes, if the wedding ring swings in a circular motion, you will be having a girl. If it moves back and forth in a motion like a pendulum, you will be having a boy.

Of course my ring moved back and forth!

I think Mary Grace is having a girl. And I absolutely LOVE the girl name she and Daryl have picked out, so I hope they have a chance to use it. However, this is only my prediction, and I have been wrong on several occasions. Right up until the moment I gave birth to Lilah, Mike and I were convinced we would be welcoming little Henry into this world.

Mary Grace and Daryl, I had a great time getting to know you (even with the below zero temperatures!). I can’t wait to meet your little girl…or boy.

My heart.

Lilah, in a matter of three short years, you have changed me inside and out. You have made me a better person. A more patient person. You make me laugh every day. You surprise me every day. You challenge me every day. You stretch me to my limits and then melt my heart with a simple, “I love you.” As you grow, I grow with you. As a mother and as a person. As I write this post, you are in the kitchen, making crafts with your daddy. Pink, of course.

You love the colour pink. As much as I have tried not to establish any gender biases in our home, you have still become the girliest of girls. You have an entire drawer filled with adorable jeans which you flatly refuse to wear. You are not a jeans and t-shirt kind of girl. You would wear a party dress every day if you could, and most days, you do. When we discussed having a birthday party, you wanted a girls only Pinkalicious party. It was your own idea, the inspiration coming from your current favourite book. How could I refuse?

We started off your party-day (Friday) with a giant bowl of pink Fruit Loops (the night before, your Aunt Karla and I separated all of the pink cereal out of the box).It was a very special treat. You were off the wall from the sugar, and at one point during your party, squealed with delight (or too much sugar in your system), “I’m just so SO excited that all of my friends are here!”

You are three years old. Three! You are so creative. You love to pretend. You could sit on my lap and listen to me read stories for hours. You love to dance in the kitchen while you look at your reflection in the fridge. You love nail polish and hairspray, Mary Poppins and rubber boots (always on the wrong feet, because they are “comfy that way”). You love to dress your little sister up like a princess, and your “puppy” can often be found sleeping beside the wood stove adorned with pearls. You drive me crazy sucking on the ends your hair and sticking your finger up your nose. No matter how many layers I dress you in the morning, you somehow always seem to end up running around the house wearing nothing but undies.

You are and will always be my baby. Whether you are three or thirty three. All of the sleepless nights, the worry, the tantrums and timeouts are worth every moment of YOU. Sometimes I wonder at the marvel that you grew inside of me and now you are this little person walking around outside of my body in sparkly shoes.  For nine (and a half) months, I carried you in my womb, warm like Daddy’s hands and soft like Millie’s cheeks. You know what my heart sounds like from the inside. At night, while you moved inside of me, I wondered what you would look like and who you would become. You are so much better than anything I could have imagined. My little spitfire in pink shoes. My firstborn baby. My three year old girl.

Mama loves you, Chick-a-dee.

Miss A. was one of the biggest newborn girls I have photographed, but when I arrived at the session, she still seemed soooo tiny to me. She is such a sweetheart and so cute. I love how big sister, R., is starting to have a mischievous side. Her little “scrunchy” smile has got to be the cutest thing. She just looks like she is up to something!

Theresa and Darcy, your daughters are oh so lovely. Enjoy these moments. In an instant, your girls will be grown.

cute little headbands, of course by the ever so talented Tracey of: Mes Belles Fleurs